I talked with a friend this morning and I told her how frustrated I am. She explained that frustration is the combination of anger + hopelessness. Totally correct. She said that anger is okay, the bible even says so, but hopelessness is not. Hopelessness is a lack of faith. If I feel hopeless I don't believe that things will change. I don't believe God wants more for me. I don't believe he will answer me when I call. As a result, things won't change.
The bible says "...believe what you say and you will have it." Well, you've heard what I say about my husband. I have it. God is true and faithful.
I must deal with my hopelessness. I need to work that through and get healing for it so that I can really walk in faith.
When that happens, it won't even matter if things change or not because I will be in such a right place with God. But then things will change...because I will be in such a right place with God.
I can say all these things, believe lots of things, but if the thread of hopelessness is still there, all the rest is useless.
Hopelessness really does equal faithlessness.
It seems ridiculous because my only HOPE is God...
It's not about my husband.
It's about me and God.
Period.